Haftarah Commentary Parashat Terumah I Kings 5:26 – 6:13 by Rabbi Charles Simon

Editors Note: Each week for the past three years FJMC has been distributing a Haftarah commentary called “The Unraveller” (a link to their archive is on this page). Going forward MENTSCHEN will post each issue of “The Unraveller” for your interest and to invite you to add your voice to the discussion of our texts. This week’s commentary is written by FJMC Executive Director, Rabbi Charles Simon.

Imagine you had a project. It could be a personal one or it might be part of your job if you worked for a large or multi-national corporation. The project theoretically represented what you hoped would stimulate others to change their behavior, to turn over a new leaf. It was what you imagined would be the most important accomplishment of your life. It was your legacy.

But it was expensive and in order to bring the project in within budget and on time you needed to employ men and pay them substandard wages and house them in less than healthy facilities. It was a difficult decision but you reasoned that the greater good resulting from the success of this project, justified your behavior.

This morning’s haftarah details Solomon’s activities when he agreed to build a Temple to God. He was gifted with wisdom and wisely established a strategic alliance, a fair trade treaty, with his neighbor Hiram, King of Tyre. Hiram had the necessary raw materials needed to build the Temple but unfortunately, Solomon; the good and wise King couldn’t afford it. He had a negative balance of trade. What to do? Continue reading

4 Comments

Filed under Heartfelt Judaism

Mensa Mentschen Puzzle #15 by Arnie Miller, The Mensa Math Mensch

Sure it’s great to have a conversation about the important things on our minds

…but it’s also fun to put those minds to work!

Each month, puzzle editors Arnie Miller and Morey Waltuck will issue a challenge to Mentschen readers.

KEEP READING FOR THIS MONTH’S PUZZLE!

Check back to the comments section to see a list of men who solve the puzzle. Can you be the first with the solution? All men who solve the puzzle will also be listed in the next issue of Mentschen, and be recognized at the 2013 FJMC Convention.

 

THIS MONTH’S PUZZLE: Continue reading

Leave a Comment

Filed under Heartfelt Judaism

The Girl Next Door by Steve Krodman

It was sometime in 1956 or ’57 when the four-year-old Elisson noticed big doings going on next door.

Gargantuan machines came and dug out a humongous hole, piling up mountains of dirt around its perimeter. It looked like a perfect place to play, but the young lad was given strict instructions to stay the hell away from that big hole and those mounds of earth lest he be swallowed up in an unfortunate accidental manner. Soon other machines came, and with them an army of men with hammers, nails, and great planks of wood. And as the days wore on, a house – a big one, with two stories – began to take shape.

How long it took to build that house, who can say? Little Elisson certainly cannot, for it is some 55-odd years later, and his memories of those days are necessarily befogged, seen as if through a scrim of cheesecloth. But whether it was a process measured in weeks or months matters not at all. All that does matter is that it was, eventually, complete, whereupon a family moved in… and I met the Girl Next Door.

She was a dark-haired beauty, and despite her having three years on me, I was smitten. As smitten as a four-year-old could be, I suppose.

TGND, as it happens, was the youngest of four, all sisters, the eldest of whom was a full eighteen years her senior. Shortly after the family moved in, said eldest sister got married, and in true Italian family tradition, ended up living just three doors up the street in a house that her father and husband built.

We would spend lazy summer afternoons watching the butterflies flutter around the towering buddleja bush in our back yard, doing whatever little kids do. Of course, being that we were so different in age, TGND and I traveled in different circles, and as the years went by we would see less and less of each other… except on those occasions when she was called upon to baby-sit for me and my brother, the Other Elisson.

Eventually, we relocated. It was all of three blocks to the southwest, but it meant that The Girl Next Door was no longer Next Door, alas. By that time, she was a newly-minted high-school graduate anyway; she would not be spending much time in the neighborhood any longer. And three years later, I moved away – first to university, then to Sweat City – and I saw no more of TGND.

* * *Last Monday, on the way to visit Eli (hizzownself) at the hospital, I took a brief detour and stopped in at the West Islip Public Library.

After waiting for a suitable opportunity, I walked over to the desk where sat one of the librarians and leaned over toward her, in the manner of someone who was about to ask a question but was not quite sure what it was he wanted to ask. She looked at me, puzzled at first, and then the light of recognition dawned. “I can’t believe it.”

Of course it was The Girl Next Door. It might have taken her longer to figure out who I was, had it not been for The Other Elisson having stopped by the previous week. Still, not bad – given that she had not laid eyes on me in something like forty-five years.

Remarkably, she hadn’t changed all that much… and her bright-eyed smile and little-girl voice hadn’t changed at all.

We spent the better part of an hour swapping stories, learning about each other’s families, and reminiscing about the Old Neighborhood. TGND was appalled to hear that Alec Baldwin had bought the old Bookmobile… she used to babysit him and had nought good to say about him, his obnoxious brood of brothers (except for Billy), his lecherous, Fred Flintstone-like father, or his house, which had a back yard filled with debris, unmowed grass, and raw sewage. She recalled the old butterfly-chasing days (“You used to stick ’em in that jar and kill ’em”) and her admiration for my mother, who (unlike all of the other suburban mommies in our neighborhood) showed her independence by playing golf three times a week.

Ahhh, memories.

The time flew past: All too soon, it was time to go and catch Dad as his lunch time began. And so we said our goodbyes.

As we move our playing pieces across the gameboard of Life, there are people who become part of our daily existence – family, friends, business colleagues, and the like – and there are others who, in the grand scheme of things, form the backdrop against which that existence plays out. Perhaps The Girl Next Door falls more into that second category, as do most of the people of my early days. Yet, in a small way, she will always be part of me, for she made an indelible impression fifty-five years ago, when I was of an impressionable age.

And how could I ever forget her, anyway? Fate would never allow it: Donna, my wife of nearly 35 years, shares her given name.

3 Comments

Filed under Hearing Men's Voices

On My Father’s Yortseyt by Arnold M. Eisen

It’s not difficult to recall numerous ways in which I have been shaped—as a person, a father, a Jew, a man, a friend, a husband, and much, much more—by my father, Alan Eisen (z”l), whose third yortseyt I will observe in early January. It is appropriate to write this particular recollection of him for the Federation of Jewish Men’s Clubs (FJMC) with a plaque and framed certificate nearby that testify to his “Man of the Year” awards from the Men’s Club of Congregation Emanu-El in Philadelphia. I got my musical ability from my father (my mother, a source of great influence and inspiration as well, could not carry a tune, though she did play the piano). I suspect the fact that I do not tell jokes very often, but appreciate good puns, stems from the fact that Dad told jokes all the time, and was known for a repertoire of bad puns. It gave me great pleasure, too, when my son was born, to observe that he had inherited the double-jointed thumbs that seem to go with my father’s genealogy and that of all Eisen males. The problem is not finding examples of my father’s influence on me, but identifying areas where that influence is absent. Let me mention three zones of his impact that are particularly relevant to my current work—and that of the FJMC.

First, my Dad was pious in a way I much admired and never scorned, even at the height of teenage rebellion. Continue reading

10 Comments

Filed under Heartfelt Judaism

Happy Holidays! by Alex Romano

Happy Holidays.

We had a throw pillow that came out every December as part of our seasonal holiday decorations. It had a picture of a reindeer with the antlers made up to be a Hanukah menorah complete with candles. I don’t recall the whimsical saying that combined the secular celebration of Christmas with the Jewish celebration of Hanukah. We must have donated this decorative gem to Goodwill or the like since I can’t find it, but it defines the way in which our blended family celebrated the December holidays.

Like many families throughout North America, we do not celebrate our holidays the way we did when we were kids. For me, with my Christian upbringing, this was with presents under the Christmas tree and stockings hung by the fireplace, which miraculously filled with goodies overnight.

For many years after we married, Linda and I comfortably celebrated both Christmas and Hanukah with each of our families in ways that mimicked what we experienced as children. We had a tree in the living room, stockings by the fireplace and a Hanukah menorah or two prominently displayed. We celebrated Christmas with my family and joined Linda’s family in their various (and diverse) celebrations.

When my journey to Judaism brought me to conversion, after 17 years of marriage, our household began a transition from a blended mix of traditions to our current tradition of a completely Jewish celebration. Without any Christmas decorations remaining, that silly pillow, with its blended message had to go.  This transition took time to happen over the 12 years since my conversion. I could not immediately let go of the desire to continue to recreate, for my children, the favorite memories I had as a child. But as they were growing up, and their own Jewish identities were developing, I had to face the fact that the experiences my kids have had, and would have, are their own and not mine to relive.

Certainly navigating the uncharted waters as a blended family – and we continue to be an interfaith extended family even though we have a completely Jewish household – has been challenging over the years. Things would have been easier if we did not have different faith traditions to accommodate, but that was not the path for us. This path is one which I feel was chosen for us by a divine plan, which I am immensely happy with. Every year as December rolls around, I am filled with the joy of the season – all of the various aspects of the season from all the phases of my life – and our family’s blended history.

Happy Holidays!

 

2 Comments

Filed under Heartfelt Judaism

Rich Jews Acting Badly by Art Spar

“Once we were slaves in Egypt” is the ultimate Jewish story.  The memory of slavery is burned on our consciousness not to induce us to amass enough wealth so that it never happens again.  It is a call to be sensitive to the plight of the underclass.  Our slavery ended because of divine providence, not because we were so clever.  Some believe the story is a literal history and others believe it is our Jewish mythology.  Either way, it defines who we are and what we stand for.

 My life brings me into contact with Jews across North America.  I like to discuss politics, and I’m beginning to see a pattern.  Many financially wealthy Jews are advocating policies to cut taxes, reduce subsidies for the poor, and stop the EPA from mandating pollution regulations.  They tell me the system is broken.  But the system seems to be working pretty well for them.  And these policies will likely enhance their wealth.

 First a few assumptions:  Continue reading

5 Comments

Filed under Heartfelt Judaism

Father Knows Least?! By Charlie Savenor

Our family recently traveled to the American Promised Land, also known as Florida. Immediately behind us on this packed plane sat a family of three. Before takeoff this threesome were giggling. They may have been a little loud, but with the having experience of our own kids’ laughter and tears during trips, I make every effort to be more forgiving with others, especially when their children act out. What made this situation more pleasant was that their voices were that of happy vacation laughter that comes when a family connects with one another, disconnected from the i-anything. There really could have been a Lifetime Channel film crew taping the whole thing.

 Out of nowhere, another passenger tapped the jovial father on the shoulder and demanded, “Can you keep it down, sir? I want this to be a relaxing flight, and your family is making too much noise.” The father’s first reaction was to be as friendly as New York Jets coach Rex Ryan, recently fined $75,000 for some choice words to a critical fan. “No, lady. We are not making noise, so we will not keep out voices down.”Their exchange only got more heated from there. I watched the whole thing with some degree of disbelief. Their lack of civility was like in-flight reality TV without the benefit of a remote control’s on/off button. Thankfully the wife calmed down her husband, who responded in a more balanced way to the other passenger, and everyone agreed to be respectful during the remainder of the flight. However, one image stood out for me.

Before sitting back, the noise-averse woman gave the father a certain look.

I know that look. Just five years earlier that look was directed at me, when our son was crying mid-flight. Continue reading

2 Comments

Filed under Hearing Men's Voices

Mentschen Puzzle #14: Taking the Wellness Program Seriously by Morey Waltuck

Dave and Rob are friends that live in the same town.  They take the FJMC Wellness Program seriously and agreed to jog every day at the same time. On a particular day they each left their respective homes at the exact same time and jogged toward each other but at different paces.  When they passed each other for the first time, they happened to be exactly 700 yards from Dave’s home.
Each continued jogging at a constant pace to the opposite friend’s home, then, turned around and jogged back toward each other again. When they passed for the second time, they were exactly 300 yards from Rob’s home.
How far apart are their homes?
Try to solve the puzzle.  And, when you do, e-mail the answer along with your synagogue and city and get your name listed in next month’s issue. (Please don’t put your solution in the “Leave a Reply” for others to see)
Arnie Miller (miller.arnold@comcast.net)
Morey Waltuck (mwaltuck@comcast.net).
We received only one response for puzzle #13 and he had 16 answers, all with the digits in the correct order!
It was from repeat contributor Moshe Adler, Temple Beth EL, West Palm Beach, FL 
Here are some of the possible solutions. An asterisk means the solution is in the order 5772.
1 5^((7-7)*2) *
2 -5-7+7*2 *
3 5-7+7-2 *
4 5-(-7/7+2) *
5 5*(-7/7+2) *
6 5-7/7+2 *
7 5+7-7+2 *
8 5+7/7+2 *
9 2*5-7/7
10 5*7/7*2 *
11 5^2-7-7
12 5+(7^2)/7
12 (5-7)+(7*2) *
14 -5*7+7^2 *
15 5*(7/7+2) *
16 (5-7/7)^2 *
17 5+7+7-2 *
18 2^5-7-7
21 5+7+7+2 *
24 2*5+7+7
25 5^2+7-7
26 5+7+7*2 *
30 5*7-7+2 *
31 2^5-7/7
32 2^5+7-7
33 2^5+7/7
35 5/7*7^2 *
36 (5+7/7)^2 *
37 -5-7+7^2 *
39 5^2+7+7
40 5*7+7-2 *
42 -5+7*7-2 *
44 5*7+7+2 *
46 -5+7*7+2 *
47 5-7+7^2 *
49 5*7+7*2 *
51 -5+7+7^2 *
52 5+7*7-2 *
56 5+7*7+2 *
61 5+7+7^2 *
64 2^(7/7+5)
74 5^2+7*7
81 2^5+7*7
84 5*7+7^2 *
93 -5+7*7*2 *

1 Comment

Filed under Heartfelt Judaism

To My Daughter on Her Bat Mitzvah by Alex Romano

Jenny,

 Today marks an important step in your Jewish spiritual journey, but in many ways, your journey has been my spiritual journey as well. Your were born Jewish because your mother is Jewish. I was not born Jewish and my journey in becoming a Jew, with my conversion last year, is due, in part, to the journey that has brought you here today.

 One of the things I realized, when I was just about your age, was that I couldn’t have faith in my family’s religion because I didn’t believe that a god existed. I couldn’t find anything in the world around me that proved the existence of a god and I could see no substantiation for the miracles that I was leaning about in the Bible. I concluded that, without proof of the existence of God, there could not be belief. And without belief there could not be faith in a religion.

 Well, a few years ago, without any pushing or suggestion from either of us, you asked to go to Hebrew school and to, one day, be a Bat Mitzvah. You took to your religious studies like a fish to water, doing amazing things. And now you are now standing here today.

 And I am standing here with you in part, because you have allowed me to reevaluate the conclusions I made when I was your age. What I’ve learned, while becoming a part of this temple community and watching you go through your incredible achievements on your spiritual journey, is that there is proof of the existence of God. From my perspective, you are living proof that God exists. A child like you, and the identification and achievement your have made in your Jewish education, is a miracle happening right before my eyes. And I thank you for that.

2 Comments

Filed under Heartfelt Judaism

To My Son at His Bar Mitzvah by Jeff Kolodney

Editors Note: We all strive to be mentors and role models to our sons. One of the major milestones in the life of a boy is his Bar Mitzvah. At this key moment we have the opportunity to speak to our son and provide “words of wisdom”. From time to time “Mentschen” will publish some of these remarks and we welcome you to send the speech that you wrote for YOUR son. 

Jacob, congratulations.  You did wonderfully this morning.  I couldn’t be more proud of you.

You have impressed me over the last 6 months with the calm and confidence you displayed in your preparation for today.   Your mom and I often wondered whether you were truly prepared or just cluelessly overconfident and in way over your head. You certainly answered that question with your terrific performance leading today’s service.

You know Jacob, the whole process of preparing for today led me to reflect upon YOUR growth and personal development from an infant to a young man and MY growth as a parent.   Continue reading

1 Comment

Filed under Heartfelt Judaism